Something wrong this way comes
Last Friday I was at a play with Nikita Nopants, Ramon, and a friend from work whom I'll call Satine Sexybitch (I reserve the right to change her nickname at a future point in time).
Before the play started, something made Satine laugh and cover her face with her program. When she let the program fall away from her face, there was a large black stripe smudged across her nose. It was as if someone had come along and smeared an Adam Ant-esque line across it.
I was so startled I could only babble as I pointed at her nose. The power of speech denied to me resulted in me taking my own program, folding it in half and deliberately drawing it down my nose.
Satine looked horrified, her hand flew up to her nose, and she rubbed at the mark. "Did I get it all?"
I shook my head no, and rubbed as much of it as I could see off of her nose. Then I attended to my own nose.
Of course, I didn't get it all, but at least she didn't look like Halloween had come early for the entire play. Sure, the lights were low, but who could let their friend be stay um...besmirched like that?